Posts by paul from cleveland

i was so afraid of being destroyed at armagedon.. i didn't really find the convincing proof i was looking for.. what i did find, however, is the love and total acceptance that i hadn't felt before.

to me, that's more important..

paul from cleveland

Wow Ynot! It's going to take me a little time to sift through that post. Thank you, as always, for your wealth of knowledge.

Just one note: I want to say I don't always feel this way. I think I've convinced myself and then fears that I'm wrong rise somewhere from the deep recesses of my mind.

31

What I've found here

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

i originally came here to find proof that the witnesses don't have the truth.

i was so afraid of being destroyed at armagedon.. i didn't really find the convincing proof i was looking for.. what i did find, however, is the love and total acceptance that i hadn't felt before.

to me, that's more important..

Gayle, you're right. I don't want to go back. It felt like everyone there was just a shell of emptiness. Including me. We were all looking for love but none of us had it within ourselves to offer it to each other. How could we feel loved when our God was a relentless task master that was going to destroy most of mankind. All of us unless we stayed on the treadmill.

I think it's as simple as Black Sheep stated: "You can get the man out of the cult, but can you get the cult out of the man?" It's just so ingrained.

9

AllTimeJeff?

by poopsiecakes in

jw
friends

has anyone heard from jeff lately?

i hope he's ok and that his mum is ok too, it's been a while since i've seen him post....

paul from cleveland

Yes, I've been wondering that too. Where is he?

31

What I've found here

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

i originally came here to find proof that the witnesses don't have the truth.

i was so afraid of being destroyed at armagedon.. i didn't really find the convincing proof i was looking for.. what i did find, however, is the love and total acceptance that i hadn't felt before.

to me, that's more important..

paul from cleveland

I didn't mean there is no evidence that they are wrong. I just meant that, for me, I haven't read the "nail in the coffin" proof that I'm looking for. Yet.

24

What are the most piercing questions I can ask?

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

my sister is getting baptized soon.

she's still talking to me but i'm sure it won't be for much longer.

i've already asked her the following questions:.

paul from cleveland

It's too late now anyway. I received an email earlier today that read , in part, that she doesn't want to see anything "that could possibly show anything negative about the witnesses. I hope you understand." (emphasis her's)

At first, I got upset and told her that I was just going to stop talking to her now because I couldn't stand waiting for the inevitable. Her requirement to cut me off because I'm disfellowshipped. But then, I changed my mind and sent her the text: "I'll talk to you. You know I can't stop loving you." After that she came to the gallery where I work and hugged me, told me she loved me and invited me to dinner.

I hope she'll still talk to me even after she's baptized. Otherwise I'll just have one sister left.

(sorry if I've offended anyone by posting part of her confidential email to me, I just felt that no one here knows her, and even if you know me, I have 4 sisters and it could have been any of them)

24

What are the most piercing questions I can ask?

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

my sister is getting baptized soon.

she's still talking to me but i'm sure it won't be for much longer.

i've already asked her the following questions:.

paul from cleveland

Paul!!!!! I'm so glad to see you back!

I'm at work right now but I took a quick glance at this thread and saw your name. When I get home, I'm going to read your post in detail. I just want to thank you for coming back and letting me know your thoughts.

31

What I've found here

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

i originally came here to find proof that the witnesses don't have the truth.

i was so afraid of being destroyed at armagedon.. i didn't really find the convincing proof i was looking for.. what i did find, however, is the love and total acceptance that i hadn't felt before.

to me, that's more important..

paul from cleveland

I originally came here to find proof that the Witnesses don't have the truth. I was so afraid of being destroyed at Armagedon.

I didn't really find the convincing proof I was looking for.

What I did find, however, is the love and total acceptance that I hadn't felt before. To me, that's more important.

24

What are the most piercing questions I can ask?

by paul from cleveland in

jw
friends

my sister is getting baptized soon.

she's still talking to me but i'm sure it won't be for much longer.

i've already asked her the following questions:.

paul from cleveland

Thank you. You are right. I'm going to let this go.

Her leaving me has been part of the anxiety I've been feeling lately. But there is nothing I can do about it.

I had lost another sister to cancer recently. We hadn't talked since I was disfellowshipped. My other brother and sister don't have a relationship either. I miss them. Being disfellowshipped is totally dehumanizing. I am just afraid of losing another sibling. It made me desperate as I think how close it is before I lose her too.